“Greetings. We are not of this planet. We do not understand your strange customs. Your planet’s ecosystem is failing. Your leaders deny this. Explain. Why do your leaders lie to you? Why do so many of you believe these lies? Explain your strange customs. Why believe these lies? Save the planet. Kill yourself. Save the planet! Kill yourself!” ~The Church of Euthanasia
Or, maybe instead of killing yourself, you can figure out a way to live in healthy accord with the greater cosmos. Maybe instead of suicide, just don’t attempt ecocide. Maybe instead of giving into entropy, it would behoove you to understand the difference between healthy and unhealthy. Maybe unfucking the world (making the world healthier) means unfucking yourself first (making yourself healthier). Sure, you could take the easy way out (death), or you could challenge yourself to become a healthier more robust version of yourself (life) that lives in flexible balance with the environment.
But suicide is always an option. Nobody can stop you. As Albert Camus intuited, “There is but one truly serious philosophical problem and that is suicide.” This existential conundrum, above all others, must be reconciled before there can be any sort of clarity. Otherwise, we are left drowning in the absurdity of it all. Indeed, but the solution to absurdity isn’t suicide; it’s rebellion.
Here then are seven ways to unfuck yourself as an alternative to killing yourself.